One of my great passions has become figuring out how ideas move from “ideas” to realities. I’ve always been a fairly good “idea” guy. But, as I get older, I’m not nearly as enamored with good ideas as I used to be. I am a lot more enamored with ideas that actually make it into reality.  A valuable lesson I’ve been learning lately on how to turn ideas into reality is age-old but still powerful.  When you want to pursue a goal or reach toward a dream, set your goal in the form of a promise.

“I promise to deliver on this idea or initiative.”

If I were a better person I wouldn’t even need the word “promise”. I could just say, I WILL”. After all, Jesus said “let your ‘yes’ be your ‘yes’ and your ‘no’ be your ’no’”. But, for now, in my weakness, somehow the word “promise” carries a formal weight that is hard to replace.  There’s something powerful about a promise, (assuming you desire to live with integrity). A promise can push you past your limits.  The brilliance of the concept of marriage is that it builds a relationship on something beyond the fleeting desires of a moment or a season in life.

A promise is a guard against at least 3 great enemies of any achievement or initiative:

A Promise is a guard against EMOTION.

Feelings are very powerful. They are also weird and even deceptive. We’ve all experienced the rush of positive emotion over an idea at the creation stage. We have a great idea that fills us with a sense of hope, purpose and potential. That positive rush spurs us on to act.  Then, once we are in the true work of what it takes for an idea to come into reality, our emotions turn on us. Where they were fuel before we started they are now the mud our tires are spinning in. The idea doesn’t “feel” good anymore.  A promise says, “my feelings don’t matter. I said I was going to do it and I can choose to act – feeling or no feelings.”

And, if you’ll notice, just about every time you choose to keep your promise over your negative emotions, a positive emotion takes over.

A Promise is a guard against CIRCUMSTANCES.

Circumstances almost by definition are unpredictable. None of us knows what a day will bring.  Because of that, circumstances are good at providing us with excuses for why we do or don’t do something.  Sometimes those excuses can be good and acceptable.  But, if we are honest with ourselves, we too often impose interpretations on circumstances making them function a little better as excuses than they truly are.  Promises box us in to figuring out a new way to do things in spite of circumstances.

Anyone who has been married for any length of time knows circumstances change. A job might be lost. A health crisis can drop like a bomb on normal life. If we didn’t vow “for better or worse”, it would be easy to just go on to the next “perceived” easy relationship and start over. A promise holds you to your true north even while you’re experiencing very choppy waters. If circumstances seem to be standing in the way, commit to the promise and you will find yourself figuring out another way to get to your destination. A commitment to the promise will kick in your creative juices and you will find yourself navigating around the circumstances.

A Promise is a guard against DISTRACTION.

One of the enemies of opportunity is. . . opportunity.  One of the hardest temptations to overcome is, while you are in the valley of negative emotion over one idea, you are seduced by the positive emotion of another idea. Other opportunities come up and hold the appeal of the new and exciting.  A promise holds your head and hand steady when other things (good, bad, and ugly) make a play for your attention. A promise says, “I’m going to choose to go for what I said, no matter how appealing something else looks.”

I’m trying to learn to get in the habit of sealing my actions with a promises. . . to myself, to others and to God as the safeguard against my own weaknesses.

I’m writing while on a visit to Afghanistan.

This trip unexpectedly became a beautifully painful time of remembering a dear friend. Her name was Cheryl Beckett. She was a servant to the people of Afghanistan. And, she was truly one of the highest quality people I have ever known. She is also a modern day martyr. I think there’s a lot to learn from her life. But, first, a little background for context.

I mentioned in a previous post that a young woman who served over here for several years was killed, along with her entire team, back in August of 2010. It was called at the time, “the worst attack on humanitarian workers in 30 years”.  [click here for the original news story]

The young woman was Cheryl.

I met Cheryl in a class at my church. We easily hit it off because I had recently travelled to Afghanistan and was using the class to deepen my understanding of global work. She was there while preparing to go live long-term in Afghanistan. In the years to follow each time we did trips to Kabul, we made it a point to connect with Cheryl. When she was back in the states she would sometimes get to drop by our home in Evansville.

In 2006 my family lived in Kabul for a month. During that time, we were able to hook up with her many times and in various settings. My wife and I came to love her like a daughter and my girls came to love and admire her as the heroic older sister. She always brought a time of fun and refreshing for our family as we were wrestling with the challenge that comes with living in the harsh and intensely cross-cultural world of Afghanistan.

I remember where I was and what I was doing when a friend called to tell me she had been killed.

Between that moment and a memorial service for her I remember experiencing a unique brand of grief. Cheryl was a truly special person we can all learn from. . . which sounds so cliché to say I almost hate to write it. But, I mean it by conviction not obligation to honor someone who has died. Death can create an unrealistic mystique around someone. But, no, in this case, I’m confident that’s not it. . . not at all. I’m confident, because I clearly remember thinking these things about her when she was still alive.

Here’s some things I think we can all learn:

1. Live as Children of Light.

“You were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light 9 (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth)”   Ephesians 5:8-9

A major bible theme is our behavior can make things brighter or darker.

I remember the unique sense of grief I had when she died was tied to knowing somehow the world had just become a little darker, especially in Afghanistan. To that place, with all of its faults, she radiated desperately needed hope and grace. The ache that she was going to be missing from there filled me with a sense of loneliness wrapped up in the fear that darkness had somehow “won”. Her murderers have no concept of what they took away from their own country.

2. Be biblically “spiritual” not fake spiritual.

Cheryl was not “spiritual” in the way that many people (mistakenly) perceive it. The radical, risky and sacrificial nature of her life could lead people to imagine an overly spiritualized, churchy personality. No. She talked like a “normal” person. Her language was not peppered with “amen’s” and “praise the Lord’s” or any other of our typical churchisms, as if she were trying to be something she was not.

Her Christ-like authenticity was demonstrated in what she did and how she carried herself. She was very quick to laugh without being flippant or crass. She was obviously intelligent without being even the slightest bit aloof or proud. She was easy to talk to-–a very active listener. She was outgoing but she didn’t express it by being overbearing or one of those people who talks so much you feel like you’re waiting in line to make a point.

Her maturity in Christ showed up where it should: in how she interacted with people. She had an energizing kind graciousness. And, all of us know we enjoy being around people like that.

3. Remember a real walk with Jesus is marked with beauty and pain…so be real.

While Cheryl loved Afghanistan and the Afghan people, at times, she struggled with her mission. In her writings she sometimes wrote words like “despair”. She was honest. She wasn’t immune to or silent about the struggles of the very difficult service the Lord had called her to.

On the other hand, I never heard the slightest hint of self-pity or complaining…only searching and the wrestling of the soul.

I know what its like to spend simple short stints in Afghanistan and, trust me, it is wearying physically, emotionally and spiritually. The fact that she lived there for 6 years with very few breaks blows me away.

4. Be humble.

Cheryl had intelligence and achievement in her life carried with an endearing humility. I’ve heard true humility described as the willful laying down of one’s position for the sake of others. That’s a great description of how she lived.

She was a class valedictorian and president; an actively recruited honors student. She became a very knowledgeable professional missionary offering expertise in gardening and medicine. She was more than qualified to be on the ill-fated last team of high caliber people who hiked through the Afghan mountains delivering medical help. But, someone asked her what she would do on the team, she answered, “I can make balloon animals.”

One of my favorite moments on my current trip was getting to meet the Afghan Doctor who would have worked with her nearly everyday. He still had a picture of her on his shelf. He brought her up and exclaimed in his very limited English, “I thought her, very high, very high.” Then he said it again. Through an interpreter he went on to describe how he watched her treat all the children in the medical clinic with the same refreshing kindness. He told us, no matter how poor or dirty or diseased any child was, Cheryl would give them her trademark beaming smile and a full love-radiating hug. He said with each child she was with, she would make that child feel like the most important person in the world.

That’s biblical humility.

5. Do something to actively improve the world.

Too often we limit ourselves to avoiding doing bad things. But, we are called to “overcome evil with good”. We are called to be proactive. (See Romans 12:20)

The highlight of my trip was the unplanned and unexpected pleasure of getting to see the garden Cheryl planted. Cheryl’s area of true expertise and love, on the work side, was advanced gardening. The project she worked as her daily job during a significant stint of her time, and the contribution she made to the very poor community she worked in was showing the poor women of the village how to grow things in the desert.

This is one of her beautiful legacies. As we walked up, one of the Doctors giving us the tour said, “you should have seen this place before Cheryl was here. It was bleached dry dirt and rocks.”

Admittedly, what I thought I was going to see was a nice little green house or small room size patch of ground. What I saw was far more. Surrounding a medical clinic building was about a quarter acre of thriving plant life: fruit trees, grape vines overhead, evergreens, vegetables, even roses.

I was genuinely awed. I could see the area around the garden and know what the Doctor was talking about–it was harsh, trampled down and sun-beaten. Then, all you had to do was step through a gate and the contrast swallowed you up, calmed you down and gave its own kind of soul therapy.

I am so thankful for that place. It speaks of a principle in life we all could use more of. What are we doing that is proactively improving things around us? How are we overcoming evil with good? When I think of the horrible evil that killed my friend and I set it next to the beautiful work she did, it’s not hard at all to know what matters, and what is going to win in the end.

6. Remember where the beauty of great people comes from.

I confidently label Cheryl “great”. I’m with the Doctor, unashamedly saying along with him, “I hold her very high, very high.”

But, here’s what I always have to remember–and Cheryl knew it most of all: everything that made her the kind of person she all who knew her came to adore was rooted in her walking, living, breathing relationship with Jesus.

Cheryl loved the Lord. She had received his offer of free grace to guilty sinners. She sought his direction and counsel. She prayed. She worshiped with others. She knew the Bible. She agonized over decisions. She tried to keep her life pure. She repented of sins. In other words, she did the things the Lord calls us to do where He, in turn, makes us to be more like Himself.

I have to remember, whatever good I saw in Cheryl was seeing Jesus work through her. Her intelligence, grace, humor, depth, humility and kindness were who Jesus IS. He’s the ultimate hero of the story who has the humility and grace to allow someone like Cheryl to be a hero with him.

Note: As we were posting this we just received word that Cheryl’s alma mater, Indiana Wesleyan is naming buildings in her honor. Here is the story: http://bit.ly/IJFqc8

This past Sunday’s message, hopefully, stirred your heart for what God may be calling you to be involved with.  If that stirring is happening, what are some practical things that you can do to take it behind just a feeling?

I’m posting 3 blogs representing 3 steps we each can take to move practically on the calling that God may be stirring inside of us.  Read below or watch the video:

Watch Video

Action #3

Plan to act on it

I love the book of Nehemiah because it is a fantastic blend of the prayerful and the spiritual with the practical.  It is the story of man who is stirred by God to lead an effort to…build a wall.

It doesn’t get any more meat and potatoes than that.

Throughout the book you get these wonderful glimpses of prayer coupled with wise, physical action.  It’s a model for how our lives are supposed to work.  We are not made to be so “spiritual” that we don’t get our hands dirty doing manual labor.  We are not made to be so “physical” that we don’t have our souls moved at the deeper levels by the God of the universe.  Nehemiah is the wonderful reminder that human beings are not “spiritual machines”.  That’s why, when it comes to your Holy Discontent, you will want to make it to the place where what you’re called to goes to the level of planning and action.

Nehemiah Chapter 2 records the asking of the King’s permission to re-build Jerusalem’s wall.  As you read, it is clear Nehemiah has done some well-planned praying long before the conversation even takes place.  Watch what happens when the King asks him a question:

Then the king, with the queen sitting beside him, asked me, “How long will your journey take, and when will you get back?”  It pleased the king to send me; so I set a time.

I also said to him, “If it pleases the king, may I have letters to the governors of Trans-Euphrates, so that they will provide me safe-conduct until I arrive in Judah?  And may I have a letter to Asaph, keeper of the king’s forest, so he will give me timber to make beams for the gates of the citadel by the temple for the city wall and for the residence I will occupy?”

Nehemiah is able to answer the question, “how long is this going to take?”  And he already knows he will need letters to get through certain areas.  This reveals planned action.  You and I can begin the process of planned action.

Here are some actions you could take right away:

1.  Share it with others:

One reason I challenged you last time to be able to express your Holy Discontent on Twitter was because the act of sharing it is an action that a makes it even more real to you.  There is something about the act of putting your thoughts and heart out there for others to see, know, and interact with that pushes it even one more step into reality.

2.  Fan the flame

Yep, we are challenging everyone to sign up for the Global Leadership Summit.  Why?  Because it is a time when, for 2 full days, you can listen to people who have had a Holy Discontent spark inside of them and hear how they acted on it.

If you want to boil down the whole conference and why we make such a big deal out of it, it’s this:  come hear from those who have acted on their call so you can be inspired to do the same.

Sign up for the GLS HERE.

3.  Put actions in your calendar

We all have things on our calendar that we will do because they are on it.  Whether it is as simple as scheduling to watch our favorite show on Tuesday night or making sure we get our kid to their soccer game on Saturday morning, we will do things we have placed into our plans.  If you really want to see your Holy Discontent acted on, pick a real time and a real place on your calendar when you will do something intentionally about it.

Planning for action is the only way what’s stirring in you is going to make it into your life.  Take a few minutes just to pick a time slot, in advance, when you will make a call, go to a meeting, write down some thoughts, join a group, do some research, anything.

This idea of a Holy Discontent could be the most powerful thing in your life because it is getting down to one of the key reasons FOR your life.

Take it seriously…act.

Or, “How Twitter Can Help You Live Out Your God-Given Calling”.

This past Sunday’s message, hopefully, stirred your heart for what God may be calling you to be involved with.  If that stirring is happening, what are some practical things that you can do to take it beyond just a feeling? I’m posting 3 blogs representing 3 steps we each can take to move practically on the calling that God may be stirring inside of us.

You can read below or, take the shortcut and watch the video.

Watch Video

Action #2: Define it. . . in writing

I’m going to challenge you to take an action step.  The action is simple but very important:

Define your Holy Discontent, in writing, in 140 characters or less.

For those who are familiar with Twitter you know the inspiration of for 140 characters.  It’s a great place to start for reasons I will talk about in the next post.  But, the basic idea here is to reflect on what you can’t stand and may be called to move on and put it into words.  The 140 characters challenge is to put it into a memorable repeatable form.

In the following text, Nehemiah didn’t put his vision in 140 characters but he came close (144 to be exact):

Then I said to them, “You see the trouble we are in:  Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace.”  I also told them about the gracious hand of my God upon me and what the king had said to me.  They replied, “Let us start rebuilding.” So they began this good work.

Nehemiah was able to state the problem and mission succinctly and powerfully. We need to so the same.

Why?

1. Writing moves you beyond feelings   The “I can’t stand it” issue in our lives most often begins with. . . a feeling.  It’s a feeling in a direction but it’s still a feeling.  This is a good thing.  Human beings are beautifully wired to be more than just mental, logical indifferent problem solvers.  We are designed to feel.  This is a part of what it means to be “created in the image of God”.

When we see poverty or injustice we are supposed to feel the surge of hurt or, in some cases, even anger.  Our feelings are the rocket fuel for action.  But, effective action requires direction.  It doesn’t do a rocket much good to be all fuel and no guidance system.  The problem with feelings is just that. . . they are feelings.  Feelings are powerful, but notoriously vague.  They usually point in a general direction but don’t carry any specific instructions on what to do beyond themselves.  That’s where the power of words comes in.

2. Writing Sharpens Your Mind

Nearly any “success in life” coaching you will ever hear will include the challenge to have WRITTEN goals. Somehow writing has a way of making your thinking more ordered and “real”.  Words are, by definition, more specific and concrete than feelings.  Feelings come and go and change.  Words stand.

Writing down words requires active thought and process.  To communicate something meaningful in writing you have to follow rules of grammar and syntax.  Syntax means, “organization of words in a sentence.”  Writing is the first action of giving organization to your thoughts. To go through the process of ordering your thoughts brings more clarity to them.

Writing takes the rocket fuel of emotion and puts it into, well, a rocket.  And a rocket is a vessel designed according to the laws of aerodynamics to go in a direction.

3. Writing Begins Your Bias for Action

When you write things down you have taken a small but important proactive step.  Defining your Holy Discontent in writing is a first action that joins your heart to your body – the mental and emotional to the physical.  In a subtle way it is the first move that helps keep your holy discontent from being just another thought or, worse yet, a daydream.  An idea takes on a simple but profound physical reality.  And, the physical reality comes by a physical action you have taken.  This is to get you used to the deep connection between your dream for change and the actions that are going to be necessary to see it happen in the real world.

4. Writing Gives focus to efforts

You can’t hit a blurry target.  There is something about a memorable line that can lodge in our minds.  It will give a kind of north star when life gets confusing or overwhelmed by detail.At One Life we often repeat our mission:  “to help people far from God experience Jesus”for a very real reason. . . this is what our passion was before we ever opened our doors.  However, once we opened our doors, all kinds of details poured into life that constantly tempt us to forget why we opened the place to begin with.  A statement that represents what you really care about – known and repeatable will keep you from getting lost along the way.So, here’s my challenge to you:  Post your holy discontent on Twitter.  Put it in a succinct but powerful form.During the “Holy Discontent” sermon I shared mine in a form that was too long.  I reflected on it more and narrowed it down to this:

My Holy Discontent is:  When Jesus is perceived or presented as less than amazing.  

What’s yours?  

This past Sunday’s message, hopefully, stirred your heart for what God may be calling you to be involved with.  If that stirring is happening, what are some practical things that you can do to take it beyond just a feeling?   I’m posting 3 blogs representing 3 steps we each can take to move practically on the calling that God may be stirring inside of us.  I have provided it in both video and written form below.  Take your pick.

Watch Video

The first represents the most important of all.

Action #1:

Pray over it. 

Yeah, I know. . . you may be thinking this is a little too obvious.   But I’m saying pray in certain manner.  Pray the way Nehemiah prays about HIS holy discontent.  He was broken over the fact that his fellow Israelites were being disgraced.  His prayer, recorded in Nehemiah 1: 5 – 11, gives some principles to remember when praying for that thing we just can’t stand.

When praying for Your Holy Discontent:

1.  Worship God First

 Then I said:  “O LORD, God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and obey his commands. . .O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this your servant and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name. ” Nehemiah 1:5, 11

The first and underlying caution that should ground our sense of “holy discontent” is to keep it “holy”.  The temptation can easily be that our lives become merely about our “cause”.  God is first interested in a living, breathing relationship with Him.  God is not saying, “you need to go fix this. . . let me know how that goes.”  He is calling us to the beautiful privilege of being “co-laborers” with Him.  The whole point of a sense of a holy discontent is that it is something the Creator of the universe is inviting us to what He is doing in the world.  Let’s make sure we don’t presume to go solo.       

2.  Base your prayers and your Holy Discontent on the Bible

There are a lot of things out there that may bother us.  Remember, we are keeping the “holy” in holy discontent. Not being able to stand it when people get in the express lane when they obviously have more than 20 items is not a “holy” discontent.  It may just be a signal we need to lighten it up.

Nehemiah fills his prayer with knowledge of and references to what God had said in His Word.

 “Remember the instruction you gave your servant Moses, saying. . .”  Nehemiah 1:8

This grounds what we are concerned about in God’s character and promises.  It makes our “cause” something that we can know has eternal merit and significance.   Winston Churchill said, when it comes to making decisions,  “facts are better than dreams”.  He meant that we want to know reality as a way of deciding what to do.  When it comes to our holy discontent, I would take it a step further:  “God’s truth is even better than “facts”.

As we pursue the solutions to the massive challenges of injustice or lack of hope, we will face all kinds of  “facts” that are challenging and even discouraging. We need the deep-seated knowledge that what we are investing ourselves in is something God Himself cares about and has spoken on.   As you process your holy discontent, write down passages from the Bible that affirm and reinforce this is truly a cause God has spoken about.

3.  Identify with others those you are helping.

Nehemiah didn’t place himself over those he was trying to help.  He did one of the most basic principles of leadership:  He used the word “we”.  In this particular case, even though he had compassion for the disgrace the Jews were suffering, he also knew where they had been wrong and had brought it on themselves before God. But, even better he knew he had been a part of the problem.  His humility and self-awareness in this are profound as he writes:

“I confess the sins we Israelites, including myself and my father’s house, have committed against you. ⁷ We have acted very wickedly toward you. We have not obeyed the commands, decrees and laws you gave your servant Moses.”  Nehemiah 6b – 7.

In many, (not all) of the injustices we are hoping to be a part of solving, we often will find our own lives have participated in creating the problem on some level.

One of our One Life mountain moving prayers for the Tri-State is that God would break the hold of drug addiction.  Many of us would love to see this injustice and sin broken over our area.  But even as I pray about the problem, I need to remember that I used to do drugs.  I bought drugs from the drug dealers I now am angry towards.  I was a part of the societal sin of drug abuse.  I fanned the flame of it.  So, as I go into being a part of the solution, I need to take with me a kind of godly humility that comes from having received God’s grace so I can be prepared to extend that same grace toward others.

Pray towards practical action

“Give your servant success today by granting him favor in the presence of this man.” Nehemiah 1:11

The prayer of Nehemiah recorded for us is a lead up to his talk with his boss, the king, where he asks permission to go and lead the effort to rebuild the wall of Jerusalem.  Sometime during the course of being broken in prayer by the disgrace his people were experiencing, Nehemiah came under the conviction that he was supposed to take action.  If what is stirring in you is THE Holy Discontent God has wired you up to take on, there will be a point where you feel called to pray and MOVE.

God answers prayer through people.  As you process and pray over what is stirring in you, pray that if this is THE thing God is calling you to throw your life and energy into, He will show you practical actions you can take to be a part of the solution.  Our lives were not destined to be mere problem detectors.  We are called to be problem solvers.

Mere problem detectors are whiners.  Problems solves are world changers.

Watch Video

Nehemiah Leadership: Understanding the Times from One Life Church on Vimeo.

Watch Video

I love the subject of leadership (sometimes more than the actual practice of it!).  I believe deeply in practices like:  vision casting, values shaping, clarifying direction, giving ownership, determining strategy, creating culture, etc. etc.  I believe each of those ideas, along with many others must be actively practiced in order to get a group of people where they ought to go.

But, I can say with absolute confidence, if anyone were ever to ask me:  “what’s the most important leadership practice of all?”  My answer:

Prayer.

Conquer your problems in prayer. . .  first.

Seek guidance in prayer. . . first.

Craft a vision in prayer. . . first.

Let prayer be your life’s breath.

And, yes, I know, I know, at first look it seems like the obvious but all too cliché ”spiritual” answer.  But I would maintain it can be fleshed out in practice.  I could list many, many reasons for this, beyond what might be considered cliché.  But, here’s just a few:

Prayer reminds me that I am a follower FIRST.

I need a daily reminder that the only thing worth anything in life is God’s Kingdom. And, I need to remember I am in the business of being used by Him to build HIS Kingdom.   He’s letting me in on what He is doing.  It is only logical that I should have a real and substantive connection with Him about what He wants done. 

Paul told his followers,  “follow me as I follow Christ.” The only credibility we have as leaders is to make sure we are leading people to follow Jesus. And, the only way to do that is to make following Jesus a daily practice rooted and established in prayer.   The old saying goes, “you cannot impart what you do not possess.”  Prayer is a daily way to make sure I am following Christ, first so I can offer others the walk I have myself.  

Prayer produces perspective.

The longer I do this leadership thing I find the greatest challenge (outside of living up to what I believe I am supposed to be) is the sheer volume of issues that seem to be running all of the time around my head and sphere of influence.  I love C.S. Lewis’ words describing this feeling, “first thing in the morning all of your daily thoughts and ‘to-do’s’ seem to rush at you like wild animals.” I know I’m not the only one who has felt that “rush of wild animals” each morning.   As I pray (especially as Jesus taught us how), I find the calming effect of seeing things from “above”.  I’m reminded God is God and I am not, nor am I expected to be.  Prayer allows me to calm down and have a true sense of right priorities. 

Prayer imitates Jesus. 

OK, let’s bottom line it here:  Jesus was and is the single greatest leader who ever walked the planet. His life was sinless and his leadership was flawless.  Defining leadership as “influence”:  Jesus is the undisputed reigning champion in all of world history.  The bible is very clear about how he lived his life–captured in this simple statement: 

“Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”  (Luke 5:16)

Think about that:  as a leader, if I am doing any less, I’m being not only foolish but really, really presumptuous. 

What are other reasons prayer is so essential to leadership?